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Somebody once described it as walking closer and closer to the edge of a cliff – why see how close you can get before falling off rather than staying far away? Every night we toed the edge we would leave each other on a bad note – unhappy, frustrated with ourselves, and intense remorse knowing that we aren’t staying true to what God wants for us. And in one of our darkest valleys where we couldn’t see God at work in our lives, we actually talked about having sex. We’d known for a long time, beyond a doubt, that we were going to get married and we’d already been engaged 7 months. We’d been waiting for enough money to come to support ourselves, were working our butts off, and fighting this purity battle, all to no avail.
However, after venting about this and talking about just doing it, we both felt terrified and guilty, and realized that neither of us really wanted to cross that line after coming so far.
This means that the more sex you have with anybody but your spouse, the weaker that chemical/emotional bond with them will be.
Now that I am in a relationship that has NOTHING to do with sex (yes, we have been dating almost 2 years, engaged for the last year, and have NOT had sex), I see the blessings and benefits in waiting for marriage.
James Dobson, which is where I got this information. Being with my fiance, however, has been completely different from all of my past relationships.
It has been extremely enlightening in showing me the blessings to be had in waiting. If you don’t want to have sex before marriage, get that out on the table ASAP.
Afterward, I felt so empowered and strong in Christ for standing firm in what I believe in.
If he doesn’t agree or fights you on it, and you wish to grow in your faith, he’s not the right guy.